How aesthetic pressure sickens and isolates gay men
In Diadorim, journalist Marie Declercq delivers an exploration into the tyranny of beauty within gay male culture ranging from Renaissance paintings to filtered gym selfies. The piece opens with the haunting image of Saint Sebastian, whose eroticised suffering shaped the imagination of Yukio Mishima, and traces how this fixation on the sculpted, stoic male body has metastasised across centuries into an ideology of self-punishment and perfection.
Declercq examines how social media, dating apps and party culture sustain a relentless hierarchy of desirability: muscular “barbies” dominate, while bodies that fail to conform are mocked and rendered invisible. Through the story of biologist Thiago Parcelles, who starved himself for two days to achieve a perfect photo, the article captures the psychological toll of a culture that equates self-worth with symmetry and muscle definition.
Experts in eating disorders and body image contextualise this epidemic of self-discipline within broader patterns of homophobia and misogyny. Nutritionist Muriel H. Depin and psychologist Vanessa Tomasini note that gay men’s pursuit of masculine perfection often serves as both armour and punishment and to compensate for rejection and internalised shame. Clinical research reveals a stark reality that one in three people diagnosed with anorexia are men, and the incidence among gay and bisexual men can be up to 15 times higher.
Declercq threads cultural history through these modern testimonies. From Tom of Finland’s hypermasculine illustrations to the aesthetic codes of Grindr (No fats, No fems), she shows how desire and discrimination are woven into the same visual fabric. “We gays manage to occupy many spaces, except our own bodies,” Parcelles says, a line that anchors the story’s devastating insight.
As psychologist Pedro Carvalho explains in the article, the “defined body” has replaced other forms of identity, becoming both aspiration and affliction. Behind the language of wellness lies a deeper pathology of steroid use, normalisation of hunger and eternal dissatisfaction. The result, Declercq suggests, is a culture where suffering becomes an endless state of proving masculinity and belonging.
Declercq closes by questioning what liberation means in a culture that sanctifies suffering. The modern gay ideal, she suggests, is still bound to the martyrdom of Saint Sebastian, where beauty is through pain, validation is through punishment. From Mishima’s self-discipline to Parcelles’ hunger, the pursuit of the perfect body becomes both a performance of strength and a confession of vulnerability.
Original article ‘Martírio e beleza: como a pressão estética afeta e adoece homens gays’ by Marie Declercq was published in Portuguese by Diadorim on 1 September 2025.
It is available here.
Diadorim is an independent Brazilian digital magazine dedicated to long-form journalism, essays and cultural criticism. Based in São Paulo, it focuses on in-depth reporting, narrative storytelling, and analysis around themes of identity, politics, gender and the body.
Summary by ZN
